Dying.‏

Liebe Familie und Freunde,

....I feel like I have been staring at this blank screen for too long. I don't really know what to say. In fact, I feel a little like I am writing my own eulogy....well...here goes nothing...

So! Last week. I feel like last week someone was trying to sabotage my last week in the mission field. But at the same time, like so many little great things happened that it trumped it all. We lost a lot of time helping out with the move, and THEN one of the sisters in Pforzheim had some major dental problems so she ended up in the hospital in Stuttgart and Sister Bice got assigned to take care of her for a day. But! She is doing lots better now, which is good. :) Tja. Lots of madness. But also lots of miracles.

I said a lot of goodbyes last week. Felt kind of like somebody stabbing me in the heart over and over...annnnnd, just to make sure I REALLY got the point,...over. But! We also had some really great appointments. Which was lovely. Tuesday we had lunch with one of the schwestern in the ward and while we were giving the spiritual thought and talking about the I just got so excited I could harldy contain myself. Schw. Gierschka just laughed at me and said "I want you to be this excited about the gospel a year from now.." I will certainly try! I feel like my love and excitement for the work has grown in leaps and bounds these last transfers. This really is a great and marvelous work. Love it. So much. We also had our last distrikt meeting on Tuesday. Which was also a heart wrencher. We actually had to wrap up early and didn't get the full meeting in, but it was sooo just exactly what I needed. Totally inspired. And inspiring. In honor of me dying, we listened to the talk "Come what may, and love it." I would highly recommend reading it if you haven't, and reading it again if you have. Tja. For the closing song we were short on time and sang one verse of God be With You till We Meet Again...which was just as well because I wouldn't have made it through the whole song....
To wrap up Tuesday we had an appointment with Peter and Bettina and the Ludwigsburg Elders. It was..so beautiful. Peter asked us to sing "How great thou art" so we did. Singing through that song in that lesson was one of the most spiritual moments of my mission, because in the last 18 months, I have truly come to know how Great He is. A foundation that will serve me well for the rest of my life and into the eternities....

Hey! Cool story! Remember how about a month ago Elder Bodily and I were teaching a man in the park, and a guy came up, gave us his number, and made us promise to call him? Well! The elders have been meeting with him (gender default..they get to teach the men..) and! He now has a baptisimal date for next month! Neat huh?? I mean I may not have been able to teach him, but I was able to help find him. Small and simple means hmm? Sometimes I am real small and most time I am real simple but..in the Lord's wisdom, I AM a means...what a blessing.

Annnd yesterday, we had a "Special Stake Conference" here in Stuttgart. Do you know what that means? That means I was able to see members and investigators from Ulm, Göppingen, and Stuttgart. 3 of my 4 mission areas. It. Was....glorious. For lack of a better word. (Side story! So Sister Jencks and I were supposed to sing in the choir, but they had forgotten to tell us we were supposed to wear black. So sister Bice showed up colorful and red. I figured "oh well, it will be fine. They can just sing without us." Apparently not. The director came and said "We need you! Can't you find a black shirt??" So! Poor, poor sister Holman-the self same sister Holman that I had the insane exchange with-had the misfortune of choosing to wear a black shirt yesterday. Sister Bice:"Sister Holman, can I ask you a favor??....Can I have your shirt for the duration of this meeting?" Sister Holman: "Uh...what??" Sister Bice: "I promise this is the weirdest thing I will ever ask of you.." Sister Holman: "Yeah right..." Haha. So we swapped shirts. Sister Holman: "...Sister Bice, I am wearing red wiht purple for you. I never wear read with purple.." Naja. Hilarious.) ANYwho. Wow. I could hardly hold back tears as I got to see so many of the people I have come to love on my mission and have one last hug. I will love these people forever.

Anywho. Not that long emails haven't been a common theme the last 18 months but...I will try to wrap this one up. Appr. 72 emails later and now the last one. Mensch. I just want to thank you all for putting up with me these last 18 months. Thank you for your support, your love, and your payers. I wish I could find words to describe what this last year and a half has meant to m but I don't think I can. People always talk about missions and how they change you and...it's true. But it's interesting because every mission is so different. Every mission is unique. And my mission? Has been exactly what I have needed. In every way. And for that, I thank God every day....and will continue to thank Him for the rest of my life. The people I have met and the lessons I have learned have shaped and refined me. I still have a long ways to go, but my mission has put me on the right path. Above all I am grateful for the relationship that I have been able to build with my Savior. I know He lives. He died for us because of His love, and because He suffered for us, He loves us. Perfectly. For those of you who may be hesitant to follow His invitation, "Come, follow me.." I plead with you to do so. He knows the way, and He'll lead us by the hand.  I couldn't have done it without him. He has been with me every single solitary step of the way, and I feel like on my mission, I have finally begun to understand what that means. Of course He was always there before my mission as well, but my mission has taught me to turn to Him. To trust in Him. To let go of my fears and "walk by faith, not by sight.."
I can only hope that I have accomplished all the things the Lord had for me to do in my service here. I know I have not been perfect, but I have certainly tried to serve Him with all my heart, might, mind and strength. That my mission has been acceptable to Him is my prayer and to continue to serve Him to the end of my life is my plan. I love the gospel. I love my Savior. He lives. He loves me. Ephesians 5:8 "For ye were sometimes darkness, but now are ye light in the Lord: walk as children of light..." I feel like my mission has opened my eyes to the light. Has turned me into a child of light. I am a child of God. There are so many out there who don't know that. And that is why I have been here the last 18 months. That is why I am still here. And when I come home, I will do everything in my power to continue to walk as a child of light. To walk IN the light. And to pass the light along to those who may be lost. Luke 11:33 "No man, when he hath lighted a candle, putteth it in a secret place, neither under a bushel, but on a candlestick, that they which come in may see the light." May we always live in such a way, that all my come in contact with us "may see the light." That is my hope and my prayer for myself and for us all...

Alright. Time to sign off one last time. Again, I thank each and every one of you for your goodness and your love. I wish you a lovely week, and though this may not apply to all of you, I will see you soon:)

Love,
Sister Bice

                                                                         Stuttgart flag

                             Me, Neyber, and Paula. My family has gotten a LOT bigger on my mission....

                                                            Emily Bakos. Love her so much

Second to Last‏

Tasha

6/03/13

To: RAY BICE, Ray Bice, Michael Baxter, Justin Christensen, T Weid, T. Bice

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Liebe Familie und Liebe Freunde,

We checked our mail last week. Sister Jencks, "Sister Bice, There is a letter for you! It's from the mission home!"

"Dear Sister Bice,

In case enough other people haven't been bringing this to your attention your every waking moment the last few weeks, you are going home soon. Here is some stuff you should probably know before you do...."

...Ok, maybe that wasn't exactly what it said...it went more like,

"Dear Sister Bice,

Thank you for your faithful service as a representative of the Lord, Jesus Christ, in the Alpine German Speaking Mission. The time and effort you have sacrificed on His errand have not gone unnoticed. I congratulate you as you approach the successful completion of your mission!...."

.....but the two read about the same to me when I opened it.

 At any rate, I feel pressure that since this is my second to last email, it needs to be escecially good..but...my brain is soooo no cooperating right now..and I can't really think straight..but..I will do my best!

Soooo Stuttgart! I do love Stuttgart. I tell you what, I never knew I could love so much as I have learned to love on my mission. It really is a crazy thing. You grow to love an area and the people there so much, that you think you'll never love another area or people so much again. But then! You do. With the help of the Lord, you do.

So! Last Monday, we got to play with...Frau Hausmann! It was so fun. She drove down her for P-day, and I get to see her one more time before I leave because this weekend we have Stake Conference. :)

We also had an AWESOME lesson with our AWESOME investigator Neyber. (We actually had SEVERAL really awesome appointments last week. With investigators. Look at us go!) Anywho, Neyber is so cool. He is 20 and from Venezuela, AND has the light in his eyes. Annd I think I already mentioned that he doesn't speak German or English, but his member friends translate for us and he is super ready for the gospel. We met with him twice last week and are excited to continue to meet with him this week! Besides which the member family that we meet together with are some of my FAVORITE people in the world. They are so great. Mensch. I love them. I feel like these last couple of weeks have been just so full of miracles and love. It's like the first transfer here we were just doing all we could to get in people's doors, and now that it is almost time to go we have been building these great relationships with everybody! *sigh* But like someone once said..no idea who..."The righteous never have to say goodbye.." I love that.

Have I mentioned that Sister Jencks and I have..get..to move again? Yep. The international ward was supposed to be getting 2 more elders but, surprise, they will be getting sisters instead. Which means we need to move into the apartment that will fit 4 people. We are going to be moving on Saturday, which means I will just pack my stuff and..leave most of it packed. Naja. As if the last weeks on a mission aren't crazy enough..but! Don't worry about sending anything to a new address. Just use the old one and the Elders will get me my mail..oh, the madness. Bring it on.

Naja. There are always stories I could tell but I suppose at this point it is almost just worth it to wait until I can tell them in person. I feel like more important than what we do as missionaries anyways is what we learn. So! I will share with you a little of what I learned last week. :) So! Yesterday at church one of the Brethren in the ward that I hardly know shook my hand and said "..You sure don't look like you are going home in two weeks.." I thought to myself.."Now what could he mean by that? I still look like I'm 15? I haven't gained enough weight..?" Then he continued "..You are still so excited about the work. You're just like a greeny". Daw. Best. Compliment. Ever. It was probably partly due to my testimony that I bore in church last sunday. I realized AFTER I had sat down that I was a little like a 5 year old girl on Christmas as I talked about missionary work and the gospel and how great it all is. But! That is exactly how I feel! I have never in my life been as happy as I have been on my mission, and I have never on my mission been as happy as I am now. And it has NOTHING to do with my surroundings, rather, what is inside of me. I thought about it yesterday during testimony meeting, and the reason I have been so happy here is 1) I have been more obedient to God the last 18 months than ever before in my life and 2) I have spent the last 18 months laboring to give the thing I love most to other people. Obedience+sharing the gospel=happiness! Not only happiness, but joy as well!  Mosiah 2:41 "And moreover, I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. [annnnnd share the gospel..] For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness. O remember, remember that these things are true; for the Lord God hath spoken it." Of THAT I can testify. There truly is no other way to happiness. We certainly are not perfect but we are all down here trying. The trick is to make the best of it, and help as many people along the way as we can. I am every day increasingly more amazed at the example our Savior set for us. He showed the way and He is the way. I have been amazed at how ALL of the little bumps and hiccups, and even the mountains and earthquakes of life can be stilled by trying to do as Jesus did. His divine attributes help us overcome EVERYTHING that life throws at us. We can't get 'em just simply by asking and we can't have 'em without his help, but, as we try to become better with every little decision we make, we truly CAN "be like Jesus". I feel like I repeat myself all the time in these emails but...eternal truths are eternal truths! The gospel is just a beautiful thing. I can't believe I am really "dying". My mission life is swiftly coming to an end. I feel like I won't hardly know what to do with myself afterwards but..wir kriegen das schon hin. I am excited to apply all the things I've learned here to my life at home. Spannend. It's funny, people are scare to even say the word "home" around me for fear it will make me trunky. Psh, yeah right. I am here HEART AND SOUL until the very end. :) I love you all and hope you have a lovey week and pray every day for an unseen opportunity to bless the life of someone else!

Love,

Sister Bice

oh where oh where did my sunshine go??‏

Liebe Familie und Freunde,

     Sooo I still can't believe it is almost June. And! The sun hasn't even showed its face the last WEEK! And it is supposed to rain the whole coming week. But! What can you do? I would say dance in it..but the people here already think we are weird enough..hmm..I will think of something..at any rate..it's a good thing I'm not made of sugar! :)

     So! Last week! Flew by. In the end, we didn't have a whole lot of lessons....but! The ones that we did teach were AWESOME! We are privileged to be working with some really special people here in Stuttgart. I love them. And Tuesday we FINALLY got Sister Jencks's Visa...so she is FINALLY legal to be a missionary here in Stuttgart! Jetzt geht's los! ;) We also had a really neat District meeting. I love missionaries.

Annnd Wednesday Sister Jencks woke up sick and was bed ridden all day. Which left sister Bice cooped up in the kitchen. All. Day. Well, mostly all day. We did make it to Ward Council. Which was...hilarious. I love the German members. So. Much. I may or may not have been laying in bed trying to sleep the other night..and I was thinking about the fact that well..my days are numbered...annd I shed a little tear or two. I really do just love these people so much. All of them. Not just the ones I know, but the ones walking around on the street, the ones in the bahns...just the German and Austrian people. I guess that is one of the dangerous beauties of a mission. We are asked to give our hearts to these people, and then we are asked to leave. But! If they think they can get rid of me THAT easily...they've got another thing coming. I'll be back some day. And until then, I'll be keeping in touch. :)

     Umm! We also had a Finding Day this week. Our distrikt got together and tore up Stuttgart for 4 hours. I LOVE finding days. I love working with other missionaries because whether the people decide to listen or not, we just keep each others spirits up. And! We did manage to find some WAY neat people! Boah. It just felt great. Finding day is awesome because you get to share your testimony SO much, in such a small time frame. Love it:) After finding day, we met the Bensons at Stuttgarts one and only Pizza hut for a district dinner. Which was way cool because...our waiter? Was a member! From Africa! But lost contact with the church when he came to Germany. So we got his number. :) And! Ok..now time for my probably-should-be-embarrassing-but-I'm-more-proud-than-embarrassed moment. Long story short. I ate a whole pizza. By myself. Not that I was necesarrily hungry after half of it, but the Elders didn't think I could do it and..well..sometimes my pride gets the best of me. They looked at the pizza and looked at the size of me and so there was no way but...where there's a will, there's a way. Ha. Yeaaahhh...I think our Senior Couple was mildly shocked and appalled...haha. My mother would be proud? Well..maybe not..perhaps my father....:)

    So! Quatsch aside....yesterday was Sunday. Which is always lovely. Apparently one of the Sacrament speakers didn't show up, so they asked Sister Jencks and I to bear our testimonies. For which I was really grateful. I still am not a fan of talking in front of people..but my personal study was so good all last week that I felt like I just had to get it out! Anywho..I was thinking about how neat testimonies are. Behind each testimony lies lives, feelings, experiences, etc, that lead an individual to know certain truths. Which totally makes sense because our Father knows us perfectly and individually. Anywho. Our testimonies just never stay the same. Sie sind lebendig. They are constantly either growing..be that stronger, or weaker. And yesterday as I sat thinking about it, I was almost overwhelmed with how much my testimony has grown over the last 18 months. I am SO grateful for the opportunity that we have to change. As children of our Heavenly Father, we have been granted, through the Atonement, the ability to become better. It just is so neat. That we, imperfect as we are, have the ability and potential to become like our Savior, who is perfect. I have thought a LOT this last transfer about missions and change and how I can retain the change I have experience d on my mission AFTER my mission and decided that perhaps the greatest things one can take home from a mission (and may I add perhaps the greatest things we can take "Home" from this life..) are Christ-like Attributes. What we have become. I truly do just LOVE reading about Jesus Christ. And although I stand all amazed at all of His perfect attributes, I think Charity leaves me the most in awe. The bible dictionary calls charity "the greatest in the trio of things that abide forever." Meaning of course faith, hope, and charity. And Joseph Smith once said “Love is one of the chief characteristics of Deity, and ought to be manifested by those who aspire to be the sons of God.” To manifest="to be apparent; obvious.." Naja. I read this and thought "Hmm..well Sister Bice, YOU are aspiring to be a daughter of God..do YOU manifest His love..?" The answer..."Umm..not always.." I mean I feel like most of the time as followers of Christ we at least try to be loving people..but is it always obvious and apparent? Just a thought...

     Ok ok! I know that I am already way past most of your attention spans..but! Neat little german scripture moment! 1 Samuel 3:10 "Rede Herr, denn dein Diener hört.." The english, "Speak Lord for thy servant heareth.." And! Naja. The german is cool because you have DENN and you have DANN. Denn meaning "because" and dann meaning "then". Samuel doesn't say "Speak Lord, THEN thy servant will listen up.." rather, he says, "Speak Lord, because I, thy servant, am already listening.." I love that. I feel like sometimes I want an answer to a prayer, but have more of the attitude that "as soon as God starts speaking up, THEN I will certainly pay attention and listen!" When really, we need to be listening, because as our loving Father in Heaven, He is always speaking to us and trying to help us out....we just need to decide to listen. :)

     Ok! I will let it be before this thing gets any longer and you all start drooling on your keyboards...*wink* I love you all! Thanks for your love and prayers and support!

Love,

Sister Bice